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Welcome to AllTooFact, a news service provided by AllTooFlat.com and anchored by the Crisco Bandit, a close personal friend of ATF regular Sean T. Collins. Updated regularly, AllTooFact is your home on the Web for NewsEsque (TM), a "news derivative" developed for minimum cholesterol and maximum freshness.

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    Heavy Snow Pounds Nation; Whitney Houston's Nose Hardest Hit
    12-5-2002 (Archived)
    NEW YORK, NY - A powerful blizzard shut down passages--specifically, the nasal passages of pop diva Whitney Houston--across the Eastern Seabord today.

    Meteorologists and gossip columnists alike predicted that despite Houston's assertions to the contrary, the white stuff would continue to flow heavily, and in some places, such as Ms. Houston's mirrored coffee table, could reach levels of up to eight inches.

    On the upside, however, economists have predicted that both the stock market and Ms. Houston's husband, r&b singer Bobby Brown, will experience rising levels of green in the coming days.

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