WASHINGTON, DC - Senior Saudi Arabian foreign policy advisor Adel al-Jubeir announced Tuesday that the Saudi government has begun cracking down in earnest on terrorist funding, primarily by removing itself from power.

"Choking off the terrorists' finances is of vital importance to the successful prosecution of the war on terrorism," said al-Jubeir at a Washington news conference. "And we can think of no better way to do it than by surrendering ourselves to the Royal Executioners and getting our heads chopped off en masse. So, y'know, just popping in to say goodbye."

Al-Jubeir initially requested that in lieu of flowers, donations in the name of the late House of Saud should be sent to the Al-Aqsa Martyrs Brigades, but later blamed what he called the "misinterpretation" of the statement on "Zionist propaganda."

The House of Saud is survived by its children Hamas, 15, Abu Sayyaf, 7, and Al-Qaeda, 14.

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ATFact staffer Kenneth Lance Bromberg contributed to this report.