Autobiographically Too Flat

I'd like to start todays entry with a thank you to my loyal readership. Which, as far as I can tell, consists mainly of Sean (of Seans Corner fame) and Dov Alima. Especially Dov, since not only does he check every day for new updates, but also writes emails yelling at me when he doesn't find one.

Today I wanted to address a peculiarity of my apartment. The floors. I'm sure I mentioned, I don't live in the Ritz. There's a minor bug problem (yesterday, a centipede actually asked me to move seats, since it had called fives on the chair I was sitting in), the windows don't open (until we knock them out with a sledge, and then they don't really close so much), etc. But the floors are a real issue for me. See, they aren't that well put together.

I mean, they're warped, but that's only to be expected. But a good portion of the adjacent floorboards aren't flush up against each other (to a distance of up to an inch). Now, I try not to walk in the living room without my slippers on (either of the bunny or silver birkenstock type), so the whole "stubbing my toe on the side of a floorboard" thing isn't really something I'm too concerned about. And the floor is pretty old, I guess; which means that it's worn enough so that splinters aren't a problem. The problem really comes when I'm trying to clean the floor. Doesn't work so well, mostly because I don't have a vacuum. All sweeping does is push dirt, crumbs, etc, into the space between floorboards.

And on some reflection, it isn't such a bad thing - it's not unlike sweeping dirt under a rug. Although when you put dirt under a rug, you can't really see it anymore, and you can in this case. So it's not much like that at all... Ah well. Figure after a while, a year or so, there will be enough detritus between boards so that the cracks will be filled up completely. Then all that will have to be done is to pour in some sort of setting compound, solving the problem completely. And then it could be swept. Really, at this point, it's just a waiting game. I'm fairly certain I can outwait a floor.